This moving business is not easy for me. I don't do change very well any more. It is hard to think about leaving my home of well over 20 years. The home where I lived with my husband until his death several years ago. The home that is jam-packed with memories.
I am slowly getting used to the idea. The notion of living where I might be a bit more mobile is a definite plus. A place where I can go outside without having to use the dreaded stairs. A place, perhaps, where I can see green grass and trees rather than concrete and asphalt.
The wheels are turning. Oldest daughter is checking out home care options to deal with my physical limitations. And looking into light housekeeping services. Youngest son is in charge of finding a suitable place for me to live. He has suggested that perhaps I might enjoy living close to his family (45 miles away from my present location) so that I could spent time with my three youngest grands. That would be delightful.
I am doing my part. The canning and dehydrating, aside from the food still in my freezer, has been put on hold. I am beginning to sort and toss - some for charity shop donations, some that my kids might find useful and some for the dumpster.
All of this will take time, but there is no great rush.
I write about many things here on this silly little blog. Sometimes I debate with myself whether or not I should post about my difficulties or less than upbeat topics. But what it boils down to is that this is life. And life is not always unicorns and sunshine. There are storm clouds now and then. So I write about them, too.
What really amazes me is that there are folks out there who stop by and visit and leave comments who are caring enough to offer suggestions when I find myself in a place that is less than ideal. Many times those suggestions have helped me deal with one thing or another. I want you all to know just how much I value the friendship of each and every one of you, for even though we have never met, I still consider you as friends. Thank you for continuing to stop by, even when the unicorns are not here. I am truly humbled.
Opus 2024-395: Built, Not Chosen
7 hours ago
I totally agree. Some days I post the "bad" things happening or the reality of live when it's not grand. Moving is a huge change. Hang tight and keep smiling.
ReplyDeleteThanks, Kristina...Sometimes I have doubts about what to post, but life is what it is - good and not so good. I would likely bust a blood vessel if I tried to stay cheerful all of the time. :)
DeleteI am warming to the idea of moving. Knowing that the move will make life a bit easier once it is done is a good incentive.
May I suggest any housing that displays the FHA, Farmers Home Administration or USDA, Ag. Dept. logos. They put up the money to have these places built. We have at lest 4 here in Cokato. I know that one is multi level, but we also have one that is ground level. Every rural town has these places.
ReplyDeleteThanks Rob...I will pass the information on to my son. He is in charge of finding housing for me. Appreciate it. :)
DeleteThe Bible teaches us that we reap what we sow, Vicki. You've sown the seeds of friendship and are reaping a good crop of the same. Bless you.
ReplyDeleteWhat a nice thing to say, Gorges. I feel incredibly blessed to have the nicest people read and comment. And by the way...you do a pretty good job of sowing those friendship seeds yourself. Even if you are a grumpy old curmudgeon. :)
DeleteVicki life is like a poker game. We are dealt the cards and then it is up to us to decide whether to ante up and how to play the cards we are holding. Sometimes we win the pot and sometimes we fold and are just happy to walk away knowing that we didn't lose to much. Thanks for sharing your cards with us and know that sometimes the cards we are dealt look exactly like the hand you are holding. We all just keep on keeping on (KOKO)
ReplyDeleteSue...What a great way to put it. Sometimes the cards are really good and other times - not so much. Much of the time I share what is going on because there might be even one person who stumbles across this blog who is going through something similar. If I can give that person just a little bit of hope, then it is worth it. Thanks for reading and commenting. It is much appreciated.
DeletePS...I lived for a time in the state just north of you. Washington and Oregon are states of incredible beauty and sometimes I miss being there.
Thank you Vicki. I grew up in Texas and moved to Oregon because I met my navy husband there and this was where he was from and he hated Texas weather. Both Oregon and Washington are beautiful states.....but their politics stink!
DeleteSue...I am with you on the politics. But the beauty of the forests and ocean can make a person almost forgive them of being such dunderheads. :)
Deleteunicorns are overrated--not to mention nonexistent.
ReplyDeletewe may have to move in the next few years and i am interested in your findings and doings on the subject.
deborah...I will be posting our progress from time to time. Keep in mind, this is not a rush job. We're taking our time. Hopefully, this is my last move and I want to get it right.
DeleteSo far I have learned that assisted living facilities here cost on the average of $3500 a month. I don't know yet if there are programs to offset the cost and because I am fully capable of dealing with medications, meals, hygiene, etc., assisted living is not necessary. We are leaning more toward a nice apartment, preferably in a senior citizen building. Apparently home health care paid for by Medicare is available if I am housebound. Because my lower legs need to be wrapped 24-7 and this is something I can not do alone, and because I can not wear shoes and the arthritis limits my mobility, I may qualify. My son has ideas about light housekeeping that should work. His daughters have been raised knowing how to work. At ages 13 and 15, they are fully capable of doing what needs to be done. They would earn a little money and I would get to spend time with them. Win - win. Otherwise there are services that will do the work for a reasonable rate.
These are just the tentative plans that may change depending on what my kids learn.
try to get ground floor.
Deletesome places have common spaces indoors for exercise during winter.
i would avoid those facilities which have tv's everywhere. very noisy and no one watches them but makes conversation difficult.
All good things to keep in mind. Thanks, deborah.
DeleteIt certainly goes both ways -- you and your 'silly little blog' add a lot of joy to my life.
ReplyDeleteAs for moving. I try and remember my Dad's words. He said homes were like chapters in books. Eventually the chapter ends and you move on to the next one. Doesn't mean you aren't sad with the ending. But the new chapter can be just as good.
Anyway, his words usually help me. Thought they might help.
Was thinking of your moving - if you're not canning as much, you might consider getting the smallest freezer made. A friend is in a super tiny 1-bedroom and she made room for one in her kitchen and set it up like another counter. just a thought.
Off to the doctor's today. Mostly maintenance but hoping she'll order some new labs. Will see -- you're right, getting old is so not for the faint of heart.
Cheers,
SJ
SJ...I like your Dad's words of wisdom. I am doing my level best to see this move not as an ending but as a beginning. My kids worry. They fear that I might not make it down the stairs in case of fire. They would like to see me in a better neighborhood. And I guess I need to admit that their concerns are not unfounded. Truth be told, I am getting a bit excited about having a new apartment where life can be just a little bit easier than it is here. Sitting on a patio, coffee cup in hand, watching the sunrise/sunset is a picture I am keeping in my mind. It helps. :)
DeleteYour idea for a freezer is excellent. I will need to wait to see the layout of the new place, but I sure like that idea. Unless a refrigerator is huge, like the one I have, freezer space will be at a minimum. And if I don't have room for ice cream, I will be one unhappy camper!
Good luck with your doctor's visit today. Hope all goes the way you would like. And that old age thing---It is not much fun, but it sure as heck is better than the alternative. :)
My new doctor is amazing. After what was a long search, I have someone who is willing and able to help. I'm tickled. Tired at the moment but happy.
DeleteSJ
SJ...I am so glad for you. Finding a good doctor, especially one who really listens, is so important. Happy dance not physically possible, but I'm doing one in spirit. :)
DeleteOne of the good things about moving out of the area is that I can be rid of my doctor, who is a dunderhead. Life has its little compensations.
Howdy!
ReplyDeleteLast year my mother made the decision to sell her house (a ranch, so she could have stayed there much longer) and move into a complex that has independent apartments, assisted living apartments and complete nursing care areas.
She debated whether it was more important for her to stay in her own home for as long as she absolutely could or move now when she was the one able to make the decision. She knew that if she waited until she had a crisis then we (the kids) would end up making the decision about where she would go and, as she said, "she could have ended up in Timbucktwo".
This is the facility she wanted so when an opening came up she choose to give up some time in her own home so she would end up where she eventually wanted to be anyway.
The added bonus was she was the one to sort through all her possessions. If we had had to do that then some things that she would have wanted might have been discarded and things that didn't mean much to her might have been saved. This way she made the decisions.
I have to say, she has been doing wonderfully in her new apartment. It was the right decision for her and I suspect you will come to the same conclusion once the dust settles...
Diane
Diane...Thank you so much for sharing your Mother's story. It is encouraging to me to hear of others who have made similar changes with good outcomes.
DeleteI expect I probably could have muddled through where I am for a while longer, but as day to day living has become more difficult, I finally realized there was no point in putting it off. I will be better off and happier somewhere else and with the help I now need. I am warming to the notion of a place to live that will make life a bit easier for me.
I am just beginning to do the sorting, saving and tossing - a chore that I am glad I can still do rather than to expect my kids to do it. They will have enough on their plates in getting me moved without the added work of going through my things.
I am so glad you stopped by and left a comment. It helps.
I think you should post whatever you feel like. I feel like the process of writing things down, whether privately or on a blog is good for people. It's cheaper than therapy! ;) Take care Vicki!!
ReplyDeleteThanks, Jenn...I tried for a time to keep a journal, but I wasn't very good at it. I would write faithfully for awhile and then forget about it for weeks at a time. This blog seems to work better for me. And I just love that folks will comment. I have learned all sorts of good stuff this way. And have made friends that I wouldn't have known otherwise.
DeleteAnd you are 100% correct. This is way cheaper than therapy. :)
If your gds help you, you have to pay. If an agency cleans, it is paid for. At least that is the way it is here.
ReplyDeleteHaving relatives work for you will be much nicer! They know how to work, but maybe you can tweak their techniques, a boon to them. You can also get to know each other better.
I was often sad for you because of the view and your being housebound. However, you put on a happy face, so I never worried aloud to you.
The two girls can help you with things a housekeeping service will not. They will be good medicine for you.
I wish you could wear shoes!
Linda...I'm not sure just how it works here for paying cleaning services. If my grands do it, I will happily pay them. Those two girls are such fun to be with. Just having the time with them is worth it, and maybe they could bring their little brother with them once in awhile. This is all in the planning stages, so we will just have to wait and see how it all works out.
DeletePlease don't be sad for me. When my brother was here, he asked me how I was, really. I told him I was content. And, for the most part, I am. I can spend my days doing what I want to do. It will be nice to get outdoors a little bit after I move, but until then it is OK.
I wish I could wear shoes, too, but maybe later on I will find something that works.
Somewhere, I saw shoes that sort of wrap up and another part wraps around. They are flat and you make them fit any foot. Flat--I mean there is no shape or form around the shoe.
DeleteThanks, Linda...I will Google them and see what I can find. Something like that would work as sometimes my feet are really badly swollen and sometimes, not so much. I appreciate your help.
DeleteMy mom and dad lived in a "retirement village" called Sun City in Sacramento. He died, and after awhile my mom moved to Corvallis, as did my sister. They each got a rental home near where my brother lives. That has worked for them, but everybody is different, I know.
DeleteHarry...I'm not sure if we have 'retirement villages' here. I know there are 'senior apartments.' I am leaving it up to my youngest son to find a place for me that will suit my needs. I trust his judgement. I have lived on the other side of the city from him and his family and it was at his suggestion that he look for a place close to them. I know I will enjoy spending time with his kids. I live too far away now for that to happen very often.
DeleteThis aging thing is a bugger, but I am warming to the idea of trading in 'my little corner of the world' for some new scenery.