Tuesday, November 16, 2010

Apparently, I'm Not a Real Person

Everyone has their morning routines.  I make my bed, feed my animals and then sit down at my computer for a while with a cup of coffee.  There are some online comic strips that I read.  I like to start each day with a smile if possible.  Makes for a happy state of mind.  I check a couple of news websites to keep up with what is going on in the world.  I check my email.  Then I look at Facebook to see what my kids and grandkids are doing that day.

When I went to log onto Facebook this morning, a message came up that my account had been disabled.  So, like everybody else who runs into a computer glitch, I tried logging in a couple more times.  You know, the theory that if you repeat an action often enough, eventually it will work!  Nope.  No such luck.

So I clicked on their help button to see why I no longer had an account.  Facebook, in their infinite wisdom, has decided that I am not real.

They say that I must provide my real first name and last name.  Last time I checked, Vicki Matheny Miller was my name.  Has been for 22 years.  The Vicki and Matheny parts have been mine for 64 years.  Nothing wrong there.

Then they say that I am prohibited from impersonating anyone or anything.  I am perfectly happy with who and what I am.  I have no desire to be anyone or anything else.  So that's not a problem.

Facebook then tells me that I am prohibited from having more than one account.  I have only one account.  Now, I do have multiple blogs.  Blogger doesn't seem to mind.  But I can think of no good reason to have more than one Facebook account.  No, that's not the problem.

Then I learn that it is "strictly prohibited" to have a profile representing celebrities, pets, ideas or inanimate objects.  Maybe that's it.  Do you suppose that while I was sleeping, Noodle or Jessie or Lily opened an account in my name?  I mean, Jessie and Lily do like to hang out with me when I am on my computer.  And goodness knows, Noodle can be a bit sneaky at times, and he does like to watch what I do from the back of my computer chair.  But no, I don't think that's it.

Facebook's last reason for getting rid of me concerns spamming and harassing.  I, to the best of my recollection, have never sent spam.  I receive a lot of it.  On any given day offers arrive in my email for all sorts of things that I couldn't possibly live without.  This morning alone, I can get my very own credit cards, learn to be an ultrasound technician, sign up for tanning sessions, charter a boat, and make my skin clear and clean.  I can also meet sexy seniors, cast a personal love spell and check the 68 messages now waiting for me on a singles dating website.  I'm thinking that none of these things are going to happen.  My children and their siblings harass each other on Facebook more than I ever thought about doing.  I really don't think that I have harassed anyone lately, with the possible exception of my mailman who has lately given my mail to other residents of my building.  Perhaps I was a bit premature on that.  After all, Facebook says that I am not me, so how can my mailman know.

So.....if any of you know just who I am, please let me know.  I would be interested to find out.  Because, after all, Facebook says that I do not exist.  And if you see it on Facebook, it must be true.

Vicki Matheny Miller (or whoever)


  1. The exact same thing happened to me. I sent the disabled accounts e-mail group an e-mail and they sent back saying I'm not a real person and the decision to close my account is final. I can't imagine what they based their decision on. I only really talk to my family, post pictures of my son for my family to see, oh and they post pictures of the same son for me to see, so if I'm not real, all my family members are in on the hoax. What a mess and a terrible way to treat your customers!!

  2. The exact same thing happened to me yesterday. Could there be a Facebook glitch?

  3. Vicki Matheny MillerNovember 17, 2010 at 8:29 AM

    I have no clue if this is a glitch. Nobody has acknowledged that I am me and I still can't log on. I guess that it just isn't important enough to me to go any further with it. There was life before Facebook, and life will go on without it.